Weddings and Farewells on the West Island

Similarities between our wedding and that of Mister Doctor Brett and Mrs Mister Doctor Brett:
- The bride was beautiful
- The groom didn't fuck it up too badly
- Everyone had a grand olde time

Weekend down the Mornington Peninsula was marvellous, although too short. Good people, good times. Saturday night saw the carnage reach its peak - apparently good advice was traded, and I remember demanding that everyone present teach me a dance move before the night was through. Unfortunately, the only one I can remember was taught to me by the Mister Doctor himself, and is called, as far as I can recall, "Dancin' Like a Monkey." Minimal imaginative prowess required to envisage that one.

And just like that, we're doing the airport - Southern Cross - Hawthorn journey in reverse, onto the plane, and heading for NZ airspace, although not without a scary near-miss when dropping car off. I'd dropped the baggage and the luggage on the street corner near the station, and was heading for Mortlockville. In the first instance of Asian-driver-stereotype-confirming behavior I'd seen since hopping the ditch, a young chap turned right out of a driveway on the right-hand side of the road, and was on course for a direct hit of significance on my borrowed car. Not sure how I managed to think fast enough, but managed to compute the chances of surviving unscathed were essentially:
- carry on = his car hits my car squarely on the driver's side
- brake = his car hits my car's front fender
- accelerate = worth a try...
The only bad point about having scooted past was that I suspect he would have got the impression that I'd been speeding from the outset, which wasn't the case. Still, rather a bloke with wrong impressions of my driving habits than a massive car accident leading to airport lateness and attendant complications.

Carrying on the tradition of being on planes with interesting people, seated directly behind us was an aged Asian woman with an Australian accent who seemed determined to make the extent of her ignorance known to as many people as possible. She was incredibly irritating. Bring on the headphones and Ice Age 3: Dawn of the Dinosaurs!